Somehow last night I managed to experience nearly my entire Room 101 list. At the MPH Motor Show at Earl's Court you had: Jeremy Clarkson, cars, people who like cars and Top Gear. If there was a golf stand and a stand dedicated to Embrace, the list would have been complete. Shame.
I of course would never pay to go to this sort of thing, perish the fucking thought. But I was chucked a couple of freebie tickets and 2 passes to the after-show VIP party so like a rather desperate whore I took 'em. I was comped by the degenerate gamblers' organization that is Wild Jack Mobile Casino, who have designed roulette and blackjack games for your mobile phone. You no longer have to sit in front of your PC to lose money. No, now you can go bankrupt on the tube on the way to work. Result ! They'd also told me there would be 'poker' and a 'casino' at the party. Good enough for me.
Even though the poker table they had on their stand was of the fun variety, it was still an oasis, a sanctuary in an otherwise nightmarish hellhole of cars and people who like cars. I already said I hated them right ? The party was a laugh, free champagne, fun roulette, fun blackjack. Sadly there was a VVIP area cordoned off including Clarkson, Tiff Needell and Gordon Ramsey (right, my Room 101 list is REALLY complete) - the blackjack was interrupted briefly by an Al Pacino lookalike reporter for the LA Times who not once but twice touched my girlfriend's arse. When I said 'I'm her boyfriend' he looked shocked and replied 'shit that's no fun, if you were her husband I would have asked to take her home for the night !'
Do I really want to be in this business ?
I of course would never pay to go to this sort of thing, perish the fucking thought. But I was chucked a couple of freebie tickets and 2 passes to the after-show VIP party so like a rather desperate whore I took 'em. I was comped by the degenerate gamblers' organization that is Wild Jack Mobile Casino, who have designed roulette and blackjack games for your mobile phone. You no longer have to sit in front of your PC to lose money. No, now you can go bankrupt on the tube on the way to work. Result ! They'd also told me there would be 'poker' and a 'casino' at the party. Good enough for me.
Even though the poker table they had on their stand was of the fun variety, it was still an oasis, a sanctuary in an otherwise nightmarish hellhole of cars and people who like cars. I already said I hated them right ? The party was a laugh, free champagne, fun roulette, fun blackjack. Sadly there was a VVIP area cordoned off including Clarkson, Tiff Needell and Gordon Ramsey (right, my Room 101 list is REALLY complete) - the blackjack was interrupted briefly by an Al Pacino lookalike reporter for the LA Times who not once but twice touched my girlfriend's arse. When I said 'I'm her boyfriend' he looked shocked and replied 'shit that's no fun, if you were her husband I would have asked to take her home for the night !'
Do I really want to be in this business ?
posted by swampsterjy at 7:45 AM
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